*cackles loudly*

[jenk]

From the slacktivist's critique of Left Behind (which has spawned a website of fan fiction based on the idea of an after-Rapture world where people act like actual human beings):

An aside for my evangelical brothers and sisters: "The scripture saith, thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn. And, The laborer is worthy of his reward" (I Timothy 5:18). So tip 20 percent. At least. Divide by five and round up. If you also plan to: A) say grace aloud before the meal; B) ask your server if he/she is "saved;" and/or C) leave a gospel tract on the table when you leave, then make that 40 percent.

Also:

The spiritual warfare gurus love to cite the story of Jesus' temptation in the wilderness as though it were an introductory course in Defense Against the Dark Arts. The salient point of the story, for them, is not its profound contrast of love and power, but rather its demonstration of mystical defensive techniques. A magic trick. When tempted by Satan, Jesus quoted scripture. Thus, they believe, when confronted by the forces of darkness, Christians should follow suit by raising their wands and chanting "Expecto patronum!" ... er, I mean, by citing chapter and verse from the Bible to invoke divine protection.