jenk

This is popping my eyes wide. But to fully process will take coffee.

Scene: Convention room of a Sheraton. One hundred evangelical Christian couples for a “Love, Sex and Marriage,” seminar by Southern preacher Joe Beam.

Beam, a portly, silver-haired basso profundo dressed in khaki slacks, a sweater vest and brown tasseled loafers that make him look like a retired country-club golf pro, walks to the front of the room and proceeds to tell the men in the audience how to make their semen taste better.

Sweet stuff works, he says, which provides a built-in excuse because "then you can say, 'I'm eating this cake for you, baby!'"

The really scary quote? "More and more pastors are preaching about [sex] on Sunday" - Christian sex therapist Michael Sytsma of the Sexual Wholeness Ministry.

Seriously, I don't disagree with the overall message per se ("Married Christians ought to be having more — and hotter — sex.") I think he's cutting a fine line by saying the Bible prohibits same-sex couples and sex during a woman's period, but then I also think he's cutting a fine line by saying the adultery ban includes consensual groups. (King David had HOW many wives? You think he NEVER did a group encounter?) Still,

[H]e argues that if the Bible does not forbid it, you can do it. So bring on masturbation. Try any position in the Kama Sutra (but refer to drawings, please, not pictures of real people). Wife away on business? Have phone sex. Birth control is good. Even anal sex is OK if (and Beam believes this is a big if) it does no harm to the body.

If you are a married Christian, not only can you do all this, but you should be doing it.

Well, sure, if you insist ;)

Source: MSNBC