Rich, Successful -- and Miserable:
New Research Probes Mid-Life Angst
October 5, 2005; Page D1
By Jonathan Clements
There really is a midlife crisis.
If you're in your 40s, you are probably pulling down a bigger paycheck than ever before, and your portfolio has never been fatter. And yet, if research by economists and psychologists is any guide, you have never been more miserable.
What's going on here -- and what can you do about it? Here are some lessons from the burgeoning field of "happiness research."
• Pounding the treadmill. Numerous studies have found that our happiness level through our lives follows a U-shape, with folks becoming increasingly dissatisfied as they approach their 40s and then bouncing back from there.
"That U-shape is just so robust, across so many studies and across so many countries," says Keith Bender, an economics professor at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. "You can't get away from it entirely. But you can do things to mitigate it."
It isn't clear why we become grumpy in middle age. It could be that we become increasingly disenchanted through our 20s and 30s as we realize our lives won't be everything we hoped. Eventually, however, we adapt, which is why our happiness rises as we grow older.
Alternatively, it could be that midlife unhappiness reflects the pressure of time, with folks in their 40s caught between family demands and long hours at work.
"In middle age, when you are at the peak of your career and you're having kids, time is your scarce resource," says David Schkade, professor of management at the University of California at San Diego. "You're too busy to improve how you feel."
Whatever the cause of midlife unhappiness, don't expect your next salary increase to make it all better. Yes, folks with higher incomes tend to be happier. And, yes, a jump in your salary will briefly boost your spirits.
|
Setting Priorities
Here's what a study of
909 working women in
Texas found.
Activities most enjoyed,
in order of preference:
Sex
Socializing after work
Dinner
Relaxing
Lunch
Exercising
Praying
Socializing at work
Activities least enjoyed:
Morning commute
Working
Evening commute
Caring for children
Housework
Source: American Economic Review May 2004 |
| But soon enough, you will get used to the higher income and you will once again find yourself with a gnawing sense of dissatisfaction. Experts sometimes refer to this as the "hedonic treadmill" or "hedonic adaptation," the notion that we rapidly adapt to improvements in our lives -- and thus can end up feeling little or no better off.
• Losing the glow. Hedonic adaptation doesn't just occur with every pay raise. You see the same process with a slew of other events, both good and bad.
Feeling dissatisfied? You might be tempted to get married or have children, both of which can bolster happiness. Similarly, you are likely to be more satisfied if you take a job where your work schedule is flexible, you don't have a long commute, you work fewer hours or you have a more senior position.
"The most important thing, if you can pull it off, is to get job security," says Andrew Oswald, an economics professor at England's Warwick University. "In international data and U.S. data, it is the single strongest correlate with overall job satisfaction."
Yet none of these changes is a cure-all. While a promotion or a more secure job is desirable, it's unlikely to bring a large, permanent increase in your level of happiness. As with a big pay raise, you will quickly adapt to your improved circumstances -- and you may end up only marginally happier than you were before.
The data relating to children is especially jarring. Think having kids will make everything better? Reported happiness does indeed rise as the birth of a first child approaches. But the data indicate that parents' happiness tends to plummet immediately afterward.
"It's possible that having children has a positive effect over the long run," says Richard Lucas, a psychology professor at Michigan State University. "But having children also comes with lots of day-to-day challenges," making time-stressed couples feel even more overwhelmed.
The tendency for spikes in happiness to fade may seem like grim news. There is, however, a silver lining.
Not surprisingly, the death of a spouse, losing your job, ill health and getting divorced can all cause great unhappiness. But adaptation comes to the rescue. Folks usually adjust to these setbacks -- and within a few years their reported happiness often returns to earlier levels.
• Smelling the roses. What can you do about all this, particularly if you are in your 40s and feeling glum? Consider three strategies.
First, research suggests you can boost happiness by "counting your blessings." Sure, this sounds hokey. But according to experts, pausing occasionally to appreciate what you have may counteract the tendency to take improvements in your life for granted.
Second, think carefully about how you spend your spare time. The temptation is to opt for stuff that seems fun or easy, especially if you are getting run ragged at the office.
But studies indicate you will likely be happier if you make a point of trying activities that are enriching or challenging, such as volunteering or taking up a new exercise program, Prof. Schkade says. Be sure to mix it up a little, so these activities remain stimulating and you don't fall victim to hedonic adaptation.
Third, cultivate friendships. Research indicates that friends are one of the biggest contributors to happiness. Want proof? Check out the list in the accompanying [sidebar]. Among the most enjoyed activities, socializing with friends ranks second only to sex. |
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