Oh good God

[jenk]

Man sees Vice President Cheney at an outdoor mall.
Man walks withing 2-to-3 feet of Mr Cheney and says, "I think your policies in Iraq are reprehensible," or words to that effect.
Man walks on.
Ten minutes later a Secret Service agent asks the man if he had "assaulted" the vice president.
Man is handcuffed and transported to the county jail, where the Secret Service agent instructed that he should be issued a summons for harassment.
Source: Rocky Mountain News

Let's just count the absurdities here, shall we?

1. A Secret Service agent assigned to the vice president should KNOW whether the vice president was assaulted or not.
   
2. If he was assaulted, why wait 10 minutes?
   
3. If he was arrested for assault, why issue a summons for harassment?
   
4. Exactly how is one comment "harassment"?

Of course, if Mr Cheney interprets "I think your policies in Iraq are reprehensible" as assault, that explains why "Free Speech Zones" must be far, far away from his delicate little ears.